Photo: Rolande Duprey
“I’ll be dead in a month,” she said, just as I was ready to leave. A door knob disclosure. I sat back down. Susan said her mother had predicted and orchestrated her passing. I asked what she was feeling now and Susie said, “Just a sense. And pain.” We spoke a bit longer before I had to leave, as I was already late for my grandson’s birthday cake celebration. It was the last time I saw her, about a month ago.
Susan was my muse. She started the transfer of my thoughts to paper in a more consistent way. She assigned me tasks I thought were beyond me but proved me wrong. Our interactions ebbed and flowed over the years. She came on some of my hikes while recovering from her bouts of cancer. I worked for her husband for a few seasons.
Then, after The Election, our contact reestablished through her Poet’s Corner at the library devoted to Resistance. Susan wanted to publish more of her poetry and I offered my skills and experience using self-publishing. Thus began seven months of regular meetings to review and edit her poems. Throughout all her treatments and challenges, Susan continued to revise her work. Even that final visit included the transfer of final edits of her short poems and ditties book.
Susan glowed much of the time, even while in pain. Her exterior lightness contrasted with her inner angst. Peace now, Susan. It’s all Light now. xoxo
Beth Lapin 
An amazing tribute.
Difficult for me to process this…
You’ve written a beautiful tribute, Beth. I hope that writing it will begin the healing for you. I’m sorry for the loss of your friend.
Thank you for such a loving tribute, Beth. Still wrapping my head and heart around Susie’s passing. Sending you love, too.
Yes, I think we all are, even with its inevitability…
What a lovely piece, Beth. My sincerest sympathies to you.
Thank you. Even when you know it’s coming, it’s not easy
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Deepest sympathies. She will, perhaps, continue to be your muse…
I was hoping to hear her voice, as I try to edit her final poems and decipher her chemo-infused writing… no major interventions so far…
Beautiful tribute to your friend and muse Susan. Your spirit did not let on that you had just come from being with Susan. You hide it well, grandma. May Susan always Rest In Peace in the Light. Sending love and hugs.
Thanks, Ana. It was challenging to switch gears…
Sad to hear of the loss of your friend Beth – may her soul rest in peace and may you be comforted in some way that her life now has light –
Thank you, Susan